I took a short walk at sunset. Not very far, just down to Powderhouse Hill. Skaters on the flooded basketball court, skiers on the 175-foot vertical slope. I was surprised to see people - families - out. I wonder what those families are like. Families that can play outside together as a nuclear unit as night falls.
I texted my friend this morning: Guess what?! I don't feel hopeless or bleak! The emotional reprieve lasted for a while. Both kids were home sick, but I managed to check off some items on my to-do list and attend a work meeting. I suppose the kids had a decent day; they read, played in the snow, and worked on the puzzle of Central Europe that's slowly getting sticky from co-mingling on the table with my daughter's ramen noodles and peanut butter Puffins. But the sadness is still there, and it's heavy. It's hard to separate my sadness from theirs.
In a week my cast will come off. I saw a girl out for a run on my walk home tonight, and I envied her. Soon. Maybe the Vitamin D and sleep and mini walks will do the trick and I'll be out running again, moving my body and feeling grateful to be alive.
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